Change

Its time for a change.

I can't stand life like this anymore.
Every time of the day i think of her, when i'm awake, when i sleep, when i dream.

Going after something impossible. Time wasting. Tiring.


Change.
Not just because of relationships, but of life. I'm bored of it.
Life should be inspirational, should have a meaning, should be ...fun?
I'm experiencing none of these. Is it because of my surroundings? my friends?

...me?

Frankly, i'm tired of life, seriously. You get a good degree, you find a job, you earn money, you grow up just to worry about earning money, you retire and you die.
I see no reason why i shouldn't be pessimistic about life. Sometimes i have no idea how some people can be smiling all the time. Is it that they experienced something bad before knowing the importance of positive thinking or are they just purely optimistic? Humans and the masks they wear to face life... unpredictable.

I do vaguely remember there was a time where i was living life purely for the sake of living, where i was happy without a care in the world. Should i just fuck everything else and just smile at the sun every morning? As fake as that maybe.

Change. I need one. Quickly.